About Holly Troy

I'm a rock-n-roller poet who left the Big Apple for the Big Sky Desert where I've been letting it be and grooving with universal love, singing to the gods, dancing with the muses and bicycling with dreamtime messengers. I like altering my reality through imagination, movement, and breath — and I help others do the same through yoga and the workshop Writing the Energetic Body, a practice of "exploring writing through the lens of the chakra system." I am a certified yoga instructor through the Sivananda Yoga Vedanta Center and hold a BA in Art and Creative Writing from Hunter College. My work has been published in Cosmopolitan Magazine, Night Train, Earth's Daughters, Elephant Journal, Creative Essence Magazine, and as a featured guest poet for bentlily.com.

Grooving to the Love Vibration and a Past Blast

Videos from my musical past are starting to surface. I knew they were out there – it’s just been a long time since I’ve played or seen any live stuff.

The Halfbreeds artwork insert from the first single. Artwork by Siobhan Meow.

The Halfbreeds artwork insert from the first single. Artwork by Siobhan Meow.

I tried to convince myself that it was ok that I didn’t have any videos from shows I’ve done – but I have to be honest – coming across this video has really tickled me!

I remember this show. It was put on by Ivy Vale and was a tribute to Roky Erickson, founder of the 13th Floor Elevators. Ivy created these events called the Mind’s Eye, and this was the last Mind’s Eye event that I am aware of. Super groovy cuddly party vibe! I think this show happened in April, 1995, at a club called The Lion’s Den.

I think there is a video of the entire set – this is the second song of the set. It’s called Are You Gonna Be There (At the Love In) by the Chocolate Watchband.

The Halfbreeds are:
Francis Cricket (Dr. Francis DiDonato)- Lead Guitar, Backing Vocals
Jamey Evans – Drums, Backing Vocals
Kate St. Claire – Bass
S. Frog (Sanford Santacroche) – Rhythm Guitar, Backing Vocals
Holly Troy – Vocals

Hallelujah

Flying, swooping, listening to Leonard Cohen’s Hallelujah sung by Jeff Buckley while riding in the forest.

sun through the forest (c) 5.2015 Holly Troy

The sunlight shining through the trees was stunning. Through the camera lens, the light took on an almost solid quality.

Light as entity.

Just as I was coming to this place I was here in the song:

. . . your faith was strong/but you needed proof/you saw her bathing on the roof/her beauty in the moonlight overthrew ya/she tied you to a kitchen chair/she broke your throne and she cut your hair/and from your lips she drew the halellujah . . .

I stopped to listen – and that’s when I saw the light.

Taurus New Moon and New Beginnings

The New Moon in Taurus is coming up on Monday, May 18th. I came across this article I wrote for Deer Spirit Reiki News back in 2009 and it still rings true – take some time out to set intentions, Taurus New Moon is fertile.

Springtime New Beginnings – Open Heart, Open Possibilities
by Holly Troy

Namaste ~

It’s the New Moon in Taurus and springtime in the northern hemisphere.Taurus is ruled by the planet Venus, which is associated with love and beauty — and spring is a time of new beginnings, a reconnection with Mother Earth and green things, blossoming flowers, and flowing water. We want to be outside, to enjoy fresh air and the lengthening days, and to daydream.

Now is a wonderful time to connect with the heart center and with the planet. You may feel yourself coming to life after being dormant all winter.It’s a time to start moving and allowing your dreams to take physical shape.

Some good questions to ask yourself:

What have I been longing for?
What have I been putting off for a better time?
What do I dream about?

A great way to know the answers to these questions is to check in with your body. If they are true for you (not a “should” answer, but a real “personal truth”), then it will resonate with your heart, or your 4th chakra.

The 4th chakra is the core of our entire energy system. The French word for heart is coeur, Spanish is corazon – heart comes from the root for core. It is the fulcrum between the material world and the spiritual world. Its element is air, its principle is balance. In order to live, we need to breathe. When we take the time to pay attention to our breath, we invite our bodies to relax and our spirits to gently be known.

The heart is where we discover our emotional nature in relation to ourselves alone. (It is here where we also realize that we, ourselves alone, are really the whole world. As I inhale and exhale, I exchange the air with everything that inhales and exhales — you, animals, plants . . . it gets huge when you think about it) In the big picture, nature is always balancing itself. Bringing it back down to ourselves (knowing that we are connected to everything), we must at some point ask ourselves, “How do I achieve balance in my life?”

big clouds (c) 2014 Holly TroyThe heart takes the passion of the first three chakras and moves it to a place of compassion. It takes raw energy of the spirit and refines it, softens it, gives it an anchor.

Today is a day to make wishes. What would you like to see happen in your life in the next month? In the next year? 5 years? 10 years? It’s time to take stock and put some intentions out there.

While the moon is dark, as it begins to become bright, notice how your life is moving. I love the moon – although it is considered more of a “subconscious” planet, its phases help me to become more conscious and aware of the cycles of my own life, and, how I’d like to navigate those cycles.

When I set goals or intentions, I like to start out way down the road. What do I want in the next 5 or 10 years – no matter what state my life is like today? I like to dream BIG — the bigger the better. So, my dreams may seem impossible, but I have fun with it. Then, taking it to three years, what have I done to move toward that? then 1 year, 6 months, 3 months, 1 month – 1 week. What can I do today? What am I willing to let the universe take care of? I write it out as if everything I’ve ever wanted has already happened – and then, I let it go.

If you are in a place where you feel stuck and can only think of what you don’t want, then make a list of what you don’t want. Then, one by one, next to each item, write out the opposite of what you don’t want, and chances are you’ll be moving toward what you DO want. Check in with your heart — if it’s feeling lighter or larger or warmer or good, you are on the right track! Just by imagining something different for yourself, you’ll feel better.

If you want to make some wishes, hurray! Throw some tobacco in the wind, run and play in the springtime flowers, pour out love, bless everything you see. Give thanks as if you’ve already received everything you’ve ever wanted.

Feel good today and open yourself to feeling good tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow . . .

Blessings,
Holly

self-portrait with blue hat (c) 2015 Holly Troy

Are you really “just” fine?

I came across this TED Talk today by Mel Robbins called How to Stop Screwing Yourself Over. Mel Robbins is right on about getting what you want.

Paraphrasing Mel:

When you feel stuck or dissatisfied in your life it’s a signal that a basic need is not being met. That need? EXPLORATION

Anything that’s a break from your routine is going to require force.

Force yourself:
Out of your head
Past your feelings
Outside your comfort zone.

We are creative beings. Mel Robbins is right – it’s not that we don’t have ideas, it’s that we don’t act on them.

What do you want? What are you willing to do to get it?

Remember: You are fabulous!

May 2015 Good Vibe Challenge

At least once a day for the next month open your arms and say, “I am open and receptive to all the good and abundance in the universe. Thank you Life.”

Sunset at Forbidden Meadow (c) 2015 Holly Troy

Notice how you feel. Make note of your general vibe the first time you do this, and then again at the end of the month.

Does it feel natural and good to open your arms and embrace the good in life?

Do you have resistance? If so, where does it stem from? Could you be willing to let the resistance go? Try a smaller step. Open your arms and say, “I am willing to be open and receptive to all the good and abundance in the universe. Thank you Life.”

This is a simple exercise I’ve been doing recently. I learned it from the Godmother of New Age, Louise Hay

A Deal With God

Schulz Creek Road and Peak (c) 2015 Holly Troy

I looked up while riding Schulz Creek Road and saw the peaks. I’ve been living out here for almost eight years and I am still in awe of the beauty of this place. To either side of me was single track which I normally ride — I chose the road so I could still get a ride in while nursing an injured leg. The way down though was all swoopy fun on the AZ Trail and Moto before crossing over to Schulz Creek Trail.

To my left I saw Tom riding single track just above me. He is a graceful rider, he makes climbing look effortless. He did not see me. He was focused on the climb. Watching Tom glide and disappear into the forest and the view of the mountains inspired me to pedal faster up that hill.

If there is a God for me, it is Nature.

I started singing this song as I rolled up the hill . . .

Running up that Hill (Deal With God)

From Wikipedia – The song itself has often been misinterpreted. Bush herself has said,

I was trying to say that, really, a man and a woman, can’t understand each other because we are a man and a woman. And if we could actually swap each other’s roles, if we could actually be in each other’s place for a while, I think we’d both be very surprised! [Laughs] And I think it would lead to a greater understanding. And really the only way I could think it could be done was either… you know, I thought a deal with the devil, you know. And I thought, ‘well, no, why not a deal with God!’ You know, because in a way it’s so much more powerful the whole idea of asking God to make a deal with you. You see, for me it is still called “Deal With God”, that was its title. But we were told that if we kept this title that it would not be played in any of the religious countries, Italy wouldn’t play it, France wouldn’t play it, and Australia wouldn’t play it! Ireland wouldn’t play it, and that generally we might get it blacked purely because it had God in the title.[4]

It doesn’t hurt me
Do you want to feel how it feels?
Do you want to know, know that it doesn’t hurt me?
Do you want to hear about the deal that I’m making?
You
It’s you and me

And if I only could
I’d make a deal with God
And I’d get him to swap our places
Be running up that road
Be running up that hill
Be running up that building
Say, if I only could, oh

You don’t want to hurt me
But see how deep the bullet lies
Unaware I’m tearing you asunder
Ooh, there is thunder in our hearts
Is there so much hate for the ones we love?
Tell me, we both matter, don’t we?
You
It’s you and me
It’s you and me, you won’t be unhappy

And if I only could
I’d make a deal with God
And I’d get him to swap our places
Be running up that road
Be running up that hill
Be running up that building
Say, if I only could, oh

You
It’s you and me
It’s you and me, you won’t be unhappy

Oh come on, baby
Oh come on, darling
Let me steal this moment from you now
Oh come on, angel
Come on, come on, darling
Let’s exchange the experience, oh

And if I only could
I’d make a deal with God
And I’d get him to swap our places
I’d be running up that road
Be running up that hill
With no problems

Say, if I only could
I’d make a deal with God
And I’d get him to swap our places
I’d be running up that road
Be running up that hill
With no problems

Say, if I only could
I’d make a deal with God
And I’d get him to swap our places
And be running up that road
Be running up that hill
With no problems

Say, if I only could
I’d be running up that hill
With no problems

If I only could
I’d be running up that hill
If I only could
I’d be running up that hill

Villanelle – Pressing Against Chaos

Wish I Were the Earth

Wish I were the earth
could open my mouth
and swallow the blur.

Turn a wail to a purr
in my warm dark house
if I were the earth.

A natural re-birth
on deep stable ground
if I could swallow the blur.

Wouldn’t leave me to murmur
my pain in your couch
if I were the earth.

A place to clear hurt
to quiet loud sounds
and dissolve the blur.

Fear turns to dirt
when it is found
that I am the earth.
I will swallow the blur.

* * * * *

I’ve been going back and forth with the idea of applying for the MFA Prpeaks (c) 2015 Holly Troyogram in Creative Writing at Northern Arizona University. I’ve put together my manuscript, but have yet to write my application letter and request my letters of recommendation.

Do I go to school to write, or do I just keep writing?

This poem is another response to 9/11.

Thanks for reading.

Happy Spring!

Holly