Sunday PSA with Terrence McKenna.

Good afternoon!

I spent the morning sipping coffee and talking about freedom, art, and space aliens with Paul. Linda Perry, songwriter/producer, singer of the 90s band 4 Non Blondes, and all-around badass super business woman launched a campaign called #freedommeans – so we got to talking about what freedom means – and seriously – I went down a rabbit hole saying as long as we are stuck in consumerism and materialism we are not free. So, yah, it’s a trap and it is our culture. And, of course, there are different degrees of freedom – and what freedom means can be very personal.

After coffee, Paul and I took Duke for a walk. I was a little wound up about the garage not having enough space yet for me to create my studio – and it was eating up my thoughts. The walk helped. Paul has been writing songs and we talked about music and dreams of travel. The air was brisk. When we got back, I contacted all the people I was thinking about contacting – my old landlord, my new landlord, friends, Mom . . . I was still wound up – Paul made breakfast and it was very grounding to eat and get out of my head. I thanked Paul, said eating kept me from going down a spiral of anxiety and depression – he said he could tell I was going there and was glad the food helped. He left to write songs with Denny Laine (Moody Blues and Wings) at Mudshark Recording Studio. I unpacked more, threw stuff away, went for a bike ride, came home, did some dishes and unpacked even more and threw even more stuff away. Took the dog for another walk — 2 hours. Blue sky all around me and I could feel my Aunt Gloria who passed a few days ago shimmering around in the cosmos and the tree branches. She is alright, alright.

I feel much less trapped now. My body gets jittery when I don’t get out and move, when I don’t unplug from consumerism and materialism, when I’m not making art making music. Feeling a lot of gratitude for the sunshine and the cool air tinged with a hint of spring. Grateful I live in an actual house (and) with my partner who is kind and gentle with me even when I am feeling a little crazy. I mean, wow, I have a place to land and I am welcome and there is room and I can stand up straight with this roof over my head!

Smoothing out the ups and downs. Riding a wave of grief. This has been an amazing day – even in it’s ordinariness! 

Thanks for reading!

Big love —

Holly

PS: Here is 4 Non Blondes – from around the time Linda and I worked together at the Spaghetti Western. One day she was a server, the next day, she was a star (after busting her ass for a long long while). She always wore big ass hats – she donned the one in this video regularly. We were just kids. So happy her music exploded.