Mind’s Eye moving forward and looking back . . .

Another blast from the past.

07.01.1995

St Marks Church Graveyard on 11th Street

I sat down to eat and almost caused an accident. There are a lot of hookers right here and a man who was driving thought that I was “working” and stopped driving his car in the middle of the street. I shook my head, “no,” but it took him a while to get it. All these cars were backed up behind him, honking their horns.

Across the street I see a girl in a black t-shirt and leather dress. She is walking up and down the street as if the gravity of the earth is too much for her. She looks really young, too. A big pink bow is in her hair and she’s sucking a lollipop. Her movements are slow and at the same time jerky. She has that classic heroin/cocaine way of jolting her neck around.

Why do I come here and watch this? Why do I come here and write about it? Maybe it’s a way of helping me stay sober. I remember that feeling of the gravity. I was really dying. I couldn’t stand up straight. Perhaps I remember it so well today because I haven’t had much sleep for the past week. Last night I slept for 5 hours. I have gut rot and brain deadness.

My dreams were fragmented. I see Kate, flashes of Al. It’s like I dreamed the Mind’s Eye, tried to assimilate it.

There are some pretty scary men giving me the eye in this park. I feel like I should belong in a zoo. I’m glad there are iron bars between us.

Tom said I can take damaged stuff, but Lou makes me sneak it out and I think it’s making me look like a thief. It’s so obvious that I’m taking stuff. I wonder what Dan thinks. He looks at me with lemon peel eyes.

I used to work at an art supply store. My manager used to save damaged goods for poor artists. I scored when the packaging for paints changed! Wow. Do you know how expensive cadmium red is? Dan was Tom’s strange brother and I don’t recall Lou at all.

Oh yeah, Kate played bass in my band for a short time, and Al was a partner in a record company that wanted to sign us. WE ended up becoming friends. 9.16.2009

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I'm a rock-n-roller poet who left the Big Apple for the Big Sky Desert where I've been letting it be and grooving with universal love, singing to the gods, dancing with the muses and bicycling with dreamtime messengers. I like altering my reality through imagination, movement, breath, and makin' stuff.

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