Villanelle – Pressing Against Chaos

Wish I Were the Earth

Wish I were the earth
could open my mouth
and swallow the blur.

Turn a wail to a purr
in my warm dark house
if I were the earth.

A natural re-birth
on deep stable ground
if I could swallow the blur.

Wouldn’t leave me to murmur
my pain in your couch
if I were the earth.

A place to clear hurt
to quiet loud sounds
and dissolve the blur.

Fear turns to dirt
when it is found
that I am the earth.
I will swallow the blur.

* * * * *

I’ve been going back and forth with the idea of applying for the MFA Prpeaks (c) 2015 Holly Troyogram in Creative Writing at Northern Arizona University. I’ve put together my manuscript, but have yet to write my application letter and request my letters of recommendation.

Do I go to school to write, or do I just keep writing?

This poem is another response to 9/11.

Thanks for reading.

Happy Spring!


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Holly hails from an illustrious lineage of fortune tellers, yogis, folk healers, troubadours and poets of the fine and mystical arts. Shape-shifting Tantric Siren of the Lunar Mysteries, she surfs the ebbs and flows of the multiverse on the Pure Sound of Creation. Her alchemy is Sacred Folly — revolutionary transformation through Love, deep play, Beauty, and music.

7 thoughts on “Villanelle – Pressing Against Chaos

  1. Holly,
    Just channel that fearless inner punk woman you are and GO GO GO!
    I’ve been reading “Daily Rituals : How Artists Work” by Mason Currey (a gift from a friend and sculptor Catherine Jacobi, check her out, you’d like her work: Two of my favorite quotes from the book, First from the painter Chuck Close: “Inspiration is for amateurs, the rest of us just show up and get to work” The second is from Franz Kafka, “Time is short, my strength is limited, the office is a horror, the apartment is noisy, and if a pleasant, straightforward life is not possible then one must try to wriggle through by subtle maneuvers.” This quote is on the cover flap, but is just priceless!


  2. Holly, in spite of the theme of the poem, or rather, the motivation behind it, the poem is rather lovely.

    And, I must confess, I was wondering when you were going to jump on the NaPoWriMo band wagon. Although, I have gone from being out of it to horse-blinders focused on many things, of late, so I probably need to catch up on which of my friends, who are also fellow bloggers are participating in NaPoWriMo, but I digress.

    Given your query, I was Divinely Guided to pull a Card for you. Lately, I have been primarily using the “Universal Goddess Tarot,” created by Maria Caratti, illustrated by Antonella Platano. The Card I pulled for you is the Knight of Chalices (more commonly known as the Knight of Cups) and it depicts Epona, the Celtic-Saxon Goddess of Horses.

    And, traditionally speaking, Knights represent messengers, as well as taking action.

    My Sense is that you need to prepare to take action regarding this Masters Program. And, given that the next Mercury Retrograde of the year (a Mercury Retrograde in Gemini, by the way) begins on Monday, May 18, 2015, if you are going to submit your application, I would recommend having all the materials ready for you to do so by no later than Thursday, April 30, 2015.


    1. Hi Robert,

      You really are the best.

      I’ve not been writing on the computer as much lately since I spend my time all day on the computer at work. I’ve been getting up a minute earlier everyday for the last month – making time for writing and meditation in the morning before I leave to work. And then, I’ve been riding my bicycle outside every chance I get.

      I am looking forward to reading your posts. I was looking at drafts I had begun for posts over the last year – I’ve got a lot of them – so there may be some postings coming up. Sometimes I just have to sit on stuff before I can share it.

      I love you! Thanks so much for the Card reading.

      Om shanti,



      1. My pleasure, Holly.

        Frankly, I have been massively busy since September, 2014, and the Goddess has put me to rest, relax, and recharge much more these last two weeks.

        Nonetheless, when I saw your post, it was a perfect opportunity for me to catch up with you and reconnect with you, too, and if I AM going to pull a Card, free of charge for someone, it most certainly shall be for someone who honors me greatly, all the time!

        It was my pleasure to do so. May Epona, Saraswati, and Khon-Ma guide you to taking your writing and your life to the next level.


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