Born on a Thursday #31 – Nothing is as it Seems

Last week I was so busy and simultaneously rocked by unexpected (and unwelcome) news that I completely forgot about my weekly post. This week is raw – there have been a few moments of catching my breath, moving through quickly-shifting emotions, facing fear, and being open to love and compassion.

I am grateful for my cooking skills, running, meditation, poetry, epsom salt baths, hugs, and friends. They have all come in handy this week.

night (c) 2013 Holly Troy According to Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, “Chaos should be regarded as extremely good news.”

Om.

Meditate on that.

Thanks for reading,

Holly

5 thoughts on “Born on a Thursday #31 – Nothing is as it Seems

  1. In which instance, I send you (on the subtle, conceptual level!): lots of tridosha-balancing bliss-churna (rasayana masala), and a really great (cosmic!) inverted karahi (Indian “wok”): the sky, under which all that is raw gets cooked–for use in savoring and advancing your (gluten-free) cooking skills-and-delectation; for your running(-into-Reality): a brand-new pair of (re-conceived) running-and-jumping shoes:

    “Up then, noble soul!  Put on thy jumping shoes which are intellect and love and overleap the worship of thy mental powers, overleap thine understanding and spring into the heart of God, into his hiddenness where thou are hidden from all creatures” (Meister Eckhart — again, always). Because when you get to the top of a 100 ft pole (or to the end of your rope, Sheena, Queen of the Jungle), ya gotta take that leap; for your meditation (& poetry!) the opening word(s) of the opening verse of the eternal text of the Fullness of Emptiness and the Emptiness of Fullness:                                         ओं अग्निमीले                                             Agnim ile    (Rk Ved I.1.i.)                              “The unity of cause and effect is adorable”

    (cognized primordial mantra of maharishi Madhuchcchandas (“Honey-Metre”!!!), as translated by His Holiness Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, August, 1970 – Humboldt State University, Ca, opening session of my first month-long residential meditation (preliminary) teacher training course/retreat with His Holiness), good for meditation and poetry, because ” ” ; for scooping more epsom bath salts: a rare(pilgrim’s) purple scallop shell; for (yet more) poetry, an old (1968) poem of my own:

                                     Again                                  a  gain                                 (re-prized)

    and for (additional, helpful, fun) friends: the Ho-Ho (or He-He) twins, Ho-ho erh hsien or Twin Immortals of Harmony (and patron-providers of wealth).  Because my friends are your friends, and the HO-HO-HEE-HEE Twins are friends to all.  And because Once when I went to see His Holiness the Dalai Lama (third time, 1978), I brought a friend who asked for advice on dealing with loneliness. His Holiness: “Make more friends.” And because I’m glad to count you among my more friends. Remember what I passed along to my sister (in a letter I shared w/ you some while back:

    “If the meditator is able to use whatever occurs in her life as the path, her body becomes a retreat hut.”                                               –Jigme Lingpa (1729-1798)

    Here’s some more stuff I wrote to my family soon after we lost our mother and my wife (best friends) on the same day:

    Of course we’re all grieving so fiercely (I’m sure none more than I! –even if all equally as much?) and it’s impossible not to feel completely at sea over it all in a more or less constant low grade sort of way and overwhelmingly acutely so at all sorts of seemingly random moments, and however often. But at the same time, I see people every day (any day I go out among people) who have it so very, very rough, that I feel a total cad for being absorbed in my own private sorrow (beyond a certain point)…if it makes me more fiercely redoubled in my dedication to try always to help lessen/eliminate others’ suffering (of whatever sort), then my sorrow is in that way a very good thing, as a motivating, catalytic agency/energy force—poison turned to medicine.  But if it just leaves me continuing to feel down, absorbed in my own private woe, instead of impelled to seek out with poignantly-renewed motivational freshness/sober(ed)ly poignant urgency how I may give joy to others, then it’s just a toxic kind of self-indulgence—“why is everybody (this cruel fate) always pickin on me?”  Just a particularly obnoxious kind of childish pettiness and bad-ego-ness.  (and I’m not sayin I don’t feel precisely this a lot, I definitely do!)  The story from scripture: of Lord Buddha being confronted by a grieving mother who had recently lost her only child to early death yearning for, perhaps demanding of Buddha that he give her some understanding/solace: he sent her out to visit every household in the nearest village and then report back to him—and of course every family had lost someone—a child, a parent, a sibling, in the course of a lifetime; no one is exempt.  So she got the point after a while and quit feeling as if she was being selected for special suffering. And from there could be open to further wisdom teachings/insight experience.         Ayur Vedic texts point out that every substance on Earth, however poisonous, is also a uniquely necessary medicine for some one or more particular specific condition/situation or other, and every medicine, no matter how fabulous, is also under certain specific conditions a deadly poison….(and Lord Buddha, among others, happens to have also been a trained and skilled Ayur-vedic physician [it was, after all, the standard/exclusive indigenous traditional medical system of ancient/classical India] and He had his original monks and nuns train extensively as Ayur-vedic physicians also, a dual profession still upheld within the traditional Shri Lankan monastic sangha).       So, anyway, part of the inner teaching of ancient India, both Hindu and Buddhist: take every poisonous subjective state/condition/ tendency as well as every healthy one and apply them all as medicine toward the one true health condition of enlightened living.             “Compound all ingredients (all subjective states/ internal condition[ing]s) into one salve or elixir—to be used to fully open the eye of the heart.” (I’m paraphrasing slightly as I don’t have the proper statements at hand). “Drive all conditionings/reactions/ motivations into one”—the desire to embody compassion as the one path to full enlightenment, and the desire to gain full enlightenment as quickly as possible to be able to begin living true unimpeded universal compassion for all beings.   Etc.       Also, “the highest secret is: take adversities as the path.”  This is such a very, very hard truth to grasp and accept until one starts willingly doing it at which point (or at some moments) it becomes obvious that it really applies most when one really doesn’t have any other choice—as long as one finds adversities along the path, one ultimately has no other option really, anyway;  But then also as soon as one starts to see them as useable/useful aspects of the path, they cease to be adversarial adversities and become allies, supports, valuable ingredients/components of one’s practice.  BIG motivators toward transcending/overcoming/subsuming/transforming suffering (achieving self-liberation! God-consciousness! supreme Unity!) as quickly as possible!!!         

    And here (and now) I must bid you adieu for the nonce.  To bed! Ciao bella chow for now 

    Patrick

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    1. Patrickji ~

      Thank you for such and moving and beautiful message.

      Yes, we all suffer, which is why it is so important to share our stories. We must remind one another that we are all human, going through some form or other of the same pains and (hopefully) joys. Compassion, compassion, compassion.

      “Make more friends.” Oh, I love! Last night I was very cranky, and wrapped up in my own head. Needless to say, instead of going home and being grumpy by myself, I decided to shift my attention to the two new people I met -my grumpiness and loneliness dissipated – and – I think I made friends with two very smart and interesting young women!

      Namaste dear friend!

      Holly

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