This year, November 6th passed – and I was so exhausted from the election drama, that I didn’t think about the passing of my sister. And my brother’s passing last year, coming up just past Thanksgiving.
This morning it felt like I crossed over a bridge, like something new was conceived. New life. And I am relieved. I really am.
When the snow melts (it will melt this week), I will go for a bike ride in honor of my siblings. Sometimes I feel them, especially Heather. Sometimes, butterflies ride alongside me, at my shoulder, and I say “Hello! I see you. Thanks for the visit.”
I have learned more about my family secrets this year – a slow unraveling that is helping me fill in the gaps. The more I learn, the more I am grateful I left home at 16. I don’t think I would be here today if I hadn’t.
I wrote and originally posted You are Beautiful and I Love You on the day of my sister’s death (November 6, 2014).
November 9, 2020
Flagstaff, AZ
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Dear Holly… I remember when you first posted about your sister. I lost my brother many years ago. I’ve found that it’s a pain that can never be fully healed but it is a permanent reminder of how present, powerful and far-reaching love is. I’ve no doubt that Heather is with you today and all days. Peace. James.
Peace to you, too, James. Thank you.
Nodding with Silence and sadness for you, and grace to you on this side of the bridge. May you get beauty-mauled by Sister Sibling Butterflies to color your ride. Not on your face, though, so you can see all the colors flying AND also clearly ahead. No trees please.
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Sad.
yes. yes it is.