Plum Doodles 418 to 419

journal fragment from of July 15, 2025

Dream: Somehow I manage to get off my bike and grab onto the dirt square. Getting off the bike, of course, was more dangerous than just riding.

I’m unable to move. A couple of people are trying to coax me, but I just won’t go. I’m shaking and terrified. 

Before that  . . . the store is closed. I cross the street — four lanes — and am on a sidewalk that is an arch — a bridge over more roads.

I say, “I didn’t wanna go to that store anyway. It’s all plastic crap.”

I get over the bridge — and that’s when I find myself at the mountain bike cliff — training — and I’m shaking so badly in the middle of a cliff I can’t straighten my legs and stand up.

I’m so afraid.

I’m so afraid.

I’m in a bad place.
I’m in a bad place. 
I’m in 

BAD PLACE.

I’ve got to make a move and I am really scared.

SCARED.
And I know the promises I’ve been told of will come true if I just surrender.

Surrender.
Work.
Surrender.
Work! Work — for Love. Work — for love. Work — for love. (la la) Love. Love. Love.

Isolation. 
Terror.
I’m in the wrong place for thrival. But where in fuck do I go?

---

July 29th, 2025
Hudson Valley, NY

10,000 Plum Doodles Project 

I often use scribbles as the genesis for paintings. These squiggles carry energy for me, and on their own, they tell a story. I call them plums because they are little treats for my imagination. I will continue adding to this project until I have reached 10,000 drawings.

John S. Hall’s 10,000 Poems Project inspired me – but rather than writing – I decided to collect my drawings. Sometimes I write when I doodle, and sometimes I share the writing as well.