July 10, 2026: Since I wrote this originally – looks like 2020 – I am grateful I took pictures of everything. The loneliness and wonder I felt at the sunset, noting how by the end of summer flower petals were red and orange – reflecting months of summer sun and heat . I spent so many years in the woods, riding riding riding, taken in by the sky, the smell of pine.

I left behind a small community of women friends. The friendships began happening after covid. 

I just returned to the east coast from Flagstaff. I was there for a month. I had planned on so many visits with friends, but for the last two weeks there were forest fires that darkened the skies and pushed everyone inside.  

I’m still unraveling my feelings about that. I felt relaxed, but my chest and arms were covered in hives until I made it back to New York. Sometimes I hide my feelings from myself, but my body knows. 

July 11, 2020 – post