After I painted this morning, I led an Aham Prema meditation which focused on the Scorpio Full Moon. I timed it to coincide with the Lunar Eclipse – the meditation was about being born into Divine Love. I felt it! Very tingly and joyful. 

As soon as I was done with the Aham Prema practice, a mucky bog of fatigue took me down. I slept for over an hour. When I woke up, there was still daylight, so I went outside for a walk. 

At first I was disoriented, but I knew I needed to be out. One foot in front of the other led me to Green Wood Cemetery. The cemetery is perhaps the nicest feature near the neighborhood where I’m currently living. Today’s route was a path through decay and filth (very Scorpionic), along a sketchy stretch of train trestle and crumbling sidewalks. An adventure.

An adventure I only need to try once. Next time I will choose another way.

I made it home at dusk. 

This is my studio after returning from the long walk in Green Wood Cemetery, and a new piece I started this morning on the table. I’m experimenting with different media and textures.

It’s strange to live in New York, the city I called home for twenty years, and feel so isolated. I’m out of synch. Tendrils of the old scene wisp past me like ghosts – I’m not tapped in. And when I do tap in, I can’t be held. I am here, but somewhere else.

Maybe I am the ghost. 

I did a vision board last night, and there is no semblance of city in the images I collected. 

I want green. I want wooded paths. I want streams, I want to ride my mountain bike. I want a home. And a studio. It looks like I want all of that in the middle of plants and trees. 

And I don’t know if it’s upstate, but upstate is a good start.

Tomorrow I do have a purpose for going into Manhattan — I’m joining Kit for a Sound Bath on somebody’s roof in the East Village. Someone is going to draw a giant mandala while the bath happens. I’m guessing there will be gongs. Maybe Kit and I will privately play music beforehand. 

We haven’t done anything publicly with the Werewolves since December – I think maybe that chapter is over?

So much feels at a standstill. And I am continuing to make art. I’m trying out a new schedule — I think it’s working. The schedule allows me to create when I am inspired, and to keep producing even when I might not feel inspired. It’s about showing up. Time is the container for focus. I don’t have all day, I have a few hours of uninterrupted creating. No squandering. Time to be doing.

And time to say hello to the muses!

~ ~ ~ ~ 

The Aham Prema Meditation from today:

~ ~ ~ ~ 

March 5, 2023
Scorpio Lunar Eclipse around 14º
Brooklyn, New York

~ ~ ~ ~

I had a dental emergency that had a hefty price tag I wasn’t prepared for!
Every little bit helps!
If you can, please help at my GoFundMe