Revisiting leaving meta
I’m reposting this essay – because I’m reviewing how life has been since leaving meta. I’m working on a post about it. For now, I’ll say I am really glad I got off facebook and instagram almost four months ago . . .
Above and Beyond the fear of Meta (from January 12, 2025)
I’m closing down my meta accounts by January 20th, 2025. I’ve been thinking about it for a long while – years actually. My main drive to stay on the platform is no longer love, it’s fear: fear I won’t sell as much art; fear I will miss what’s going on with my friends; fear I will feel lost and disconnected.
The fear is real, I have sold art through posts on facebook and instagram, and I’ve sold workshops, too – and – I have reconnected with wonderful people I had lost contact with over the years.
Last summer something happened. The instagram account I had for over a decade was shut down – their reason – for spam. (The only problem with that reason is that I never DM people – and I checked to see if there were any outgoing DMs without my knowledge. There were not). Around the same time, another account that was focused on meditation (aham prema mantra) was shut down for the same thing. It was a weird feeling. All the years and sharing and work, arbitrarily wiped out by an anonymous bot. There was no recourse for getting it back. No place to make a case.
This might seem unrelated, but during the time my accounts were shut down, my mother was dying. I made a pact with Mom to be present with her. I did my best. That pact with Mom changed the way I experience(d) everything, including my main instagram accounts being shut down. Instead of going into hyper-overdrive trying to fix the “problem”, I slowed way down. I got present with how I felt. Losing instagram felt like loss – like theft – actually. It also felt like relief. I didn’t want to put the energy into what more and more felt like high school in the palm of my hand.
I hated high school. I decided to let the accounts go.
I was closer to getting out of a time suck loop.
Now, I simply cannot do another four years of sifting through posts about Trump, Zuckerberg, Musk, and everything wrong in the world. I don’t need the bombardment. Somehow I get the news – I don’t need to cram my eyes and brain with it. I don’t need to see or hear AI “art” – ever. Instagram and Facebook are repetitive hellscapes that hurt to check in with. I barely see my friends posts anymore anyway — I have to search to see what’s going on with them.
Since my mother died, I’ve turned inward. I thought my pace would pick up, but it’s slower. I feel like steps forward are more trepidatious. I am learning and thinking and feeling in a new way. How do I want to spend the rest of my time on Earth? I want to be making art and meditating and going for hikes and riding my bike and singing and dancing and yoga-ing and seeing people face-to-face. I want to be physically experiencing my life.
How will I continue making a living as an artist, a maker, a sensitive person on the planet? I make art – with paint and canvas and cardboard and wood. I read tarot. I build workshops and teach about creativity and the moon and yoga. I lead meditations. I’ll figure it out. I have faith my work will be found.
Just because it’s not on instagram doesn’t mean it’s not happening.
Maybe I will do patreon or substack. I’ve opened a Bluesky account – @hollytroy.bsky.social – though I don’t intend to be there often. My youtube channels were created in order to teach workshops and share my music videos and art – one channel addresses creative process and one focuses on co-creation and meditation. The digital places are timestamps and archives. Sometimes they are bridges. The physical process of the work, the connection, are where it’s at for me.
The longest going digital project I have is this website. Through blogging I have made some great connections – it feels forward moving along with a creative collective of people. I’ve met journalists, tarot experts, yogis, poets, photographers, art lovers, activists. It still feels like something good is happening. I’m grateful to be here, and happy to stay!
For now, I’ve got work to do. I’ve got playing to do. I’ve got living to do.
I’ve got to make dinner!
I know we will be in touch.
Big Love!!
Holly
holly-troy.com
January 12, 2024
Hudson Valley, New York
May 5, 2025
Hudson Valley, New York
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Dear Holly,
I was so glad that you “revisited” this post. Bravo & Hallelujah!
I was also so glad to have met your mother and sister that day of the concert, to have witnessed your extraordinary tenderness. Now those images are immensely deepened by hearing what you have to say here.
Yours, Kevin
Dr. Kevin Dann 7 Academy Hill Hudson, NY 12534 718 – 938 – 1535 drdann.com http://www.drdann.com/ Contributing Editor The Public Domain Review https://publicdomainreview.org/
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What a magical time we had – actually living and playing at that concert. Nothing beats sharing music with 800 or so people and have that jump up out of their seats in joy and applause.
I’m so glad my mom was there. I’m so glad you got to meet her. She was very happy.
Looking forward to more living and playing!
:) Holly
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I can relate to many of the aspects and frustrations of your creative journey, particularly the high-school level drama in the creative world and coming to terms over the last 3-4 years that it cost more of my collective energy/resource to keep these partitions of myself active and flourishing that did little/nothing to make me a happier or a better artist/person
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Zuck has sold his soul / and those in his Metaverse / for fascist fealty
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you know how I feel about fascists . . .
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