Plum Doodles 500 to 504

journal fragment December 4, 2025

Fortune asks What prevents me from experiencing my fortune?

 . . . worry about money, social media, all the looking looking distracting

DISTRACTION: Whatever it is that blocks me from flow.

The (headline) question (one of the many) (that I can’t believe is a question): Why is it I want a facelift?
I mean, ouch! Really? It’s a thing. It’s a thing now. (not for me, but it’s a thing. During the pandemic, I said to the women in my band – “The most punk rock thing we can do is not get plastic surgery.” At least, not to do it for algorithms or political party or fear.)

I’ve been really tired this year. Let me embody the grief — I’ve been embodying the grief even as I try to grab hold of something so as not to embody the grief.

Nervous System Regulation. It’s a thing, and it’s happening. It happens to happen.

Worry. Worry is not a good use of time and fortune. 

Lack of money. What a waste. What if I am wealthy? Come on now. What if I am wealthy?

Getting knocked down and then kicking myself for getting knocked down. Nope, Get right back up. Get up. Get up. Get up.

Doubting my own abilities. Doubting my intellect.

NOT taking actions on ideas IMMEDIATELY. 

Not letting the ideas form. That’s a thing, too. Pushing them out of thew way when they arise. Shutting out curiosity. Shutting out Divinity.

Forgetting I am Divine. 

Forgetting I am Divine Love. Forgetting I am Divine Creativity. I am Divine Joy.

Sat Chit Anand. I am bliss.

Bliss Body. Bliss Body. 

Forgetting who we are, period.

Forgetting that fortune is mine. Forgetting my Divine Right to have a beautiful life. Forgetting that life is fucking beautiful. Forgetting to let it be a deeper and deeper mystery.

Forgetting that we are healing forces in the world.

I am healing, I am healed.
I am loving, I am loved.
I am playing, I am playful.
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello? Hello. I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU>

It’s like that. Be a star. A shining STAR.

---

December 7th, 2025
Hudson Valley, NY

10,000 Plum Doodles Project 

I often use scribbles as the genesis for paintings. These squiggles carry energy for me, and on their own, they tell a story. I call them plums because they are little treats for my imagination. I will continue adding to this project until I have reached 10,000 drawings.

John S. Hall’s 10,000 Poems Project inspired me – but rather than writing – I decided to collect my drawings. Sometimes I write when I doodle, and sometimes I share the writing as well.